Typical day: Describe a typical day in your life. What do you think would surprise most people about your ordinary day? How do you cherish and appreciate the everyday?
Get up. Get ready for work. Work. Lunch. Work. Go home. Make dinner. Read/watch tv. Get ready for bed. Sleep. Rinse, repeat.
I really don't think that there's anything suprising about an ordinary day. Lately I've been realizing I need to do some things during the week that make it a bit less ordinary. I need to get out and explore instead of the constant bee line to and from work.
I try to look around a lot, and focus on what I see to make sure I stop for a little bit and be in the here and now. I am lucky to work in a part of town with some amazing architecture. And that I ride a streetcar to and from work, so it's easier to check out the world, not zone out with my iphone or a book.
Monday, December 31, 2012
Dec 25- Traditions
Traditions: Do you follow old traditions or do you work to create new traditions? What role has tradition played in your life over the past year? Are there traditions you hope to create or embrace in 2013?
I'm not sure if I'm so much about tradition as I am about routine. I like my tea in my tea mug, and my week day coffee in the cream mug with the blue stripe and my weekend coffee in the orange flowered mug. I don't do well with shaking things up. Especially around my coffee. I take my coffee black, I do not take it flavoured and I don't take anything in it. The HB once (just once, he's good like that) tried to surprise me with a spiked coffee, it didn't go over very well.
So, in some ways I can be quite inflexible in my routine, but I don't really do things because "it's tradition" although I would LIKE to watch White Christmas every year and make that a tradition, it's maybe not possible. (and the fact that I watch it all throughout the year makes that ok)
I guess the wedding was a tradition that I participated in. And we did a lot of traditional things- HAVING the wedding the utmost of that. But also the being walked down the aisle. Not something I wanted to do, but in the eyes of my father an important tradition that he needed for that day, cutting the cake (but a cake made of CHEESE- and yes it was as awesome as it sounds), the morning after brunch, speeches, the first dance. We tried to fit these traditions into who we were. I had a father daughter dance, but I also had a mother daughter dance, and that was equally important and special to me.
A great tradition I do want to continue into 2013 is making the winter holidays as relaxing as possible. Days spent in pjs, doing very little, maybe a walk here and there, not worrying about a big fancy dinner because it's what is supposed to be done.
And I'm sure once we have little spykings and spyqueens running around tradition will take on a whole other meaning.
I'm open.
I'm not sure if I'm so much about tradition as I am about routine. I like my tea in my tea mug, and my week day coffee in the cream mug with the blue stripe and my weekend coffee in the orange flowered mug. I don't do well with shaking things up. Especially around my coffee. I take my coffee black, I do not take it flavoured and I don't take anything in it. The HB once (just once, he's good like that) tried to surprise me with a spiked coffee, it didn't go over very well.
So, in some ways I can be quite inflexible in my routine, but I don't really do things because "it's tradition" although I would LIKE to watch White Christmas every year and make that a tradition, it's maybe not possible. (and the fact that I watch it all throughout the year makes that ok)
I guess the wedding was a tradition that I participated in. And we did a lot of traditional things- HAVING the wedding the utmost of that. But also the being walked down the aisle. Not something I wanted to do, but in the eyes of my father an important tradition that he needed for that day, cutting the cake (but a cake made of CHEESE- and yes it was as awesome as it sounds), the morning after brunch, speeches, the first dance. We tried to fit these traditions into who we were. I had a father daughter dance, but I also had a mother daughter dance, and that was equally important and special to me.
A great tradition I do want to continue into 2013 is making the winter holidays as relaxing as possible. Days spent in pjs, doing very little, maybe a walk here and there, not worrying about a big fancy dinner because it's what is supposed to be done.
And I'm sure once we have little spykings and spyqueens running around tradition will take on a whole other meaning.
I'm open.
Dec 24- Change of heart
Change of heart: Did you have a change of heart about something or someone in your life this year? What or who was it? Why?
There is someone I have known since I was in the 2nd grade, but a couple of years ago we had a falling out. I don't think anyone was to blame, it was just time- we were different and going in different ways.
I wasn't sure if we would talk again, or what would happen, but it was pretty clear we needed a break from each other. So it surprised me that as it got closer to the wedding I wanted to talk to her. Generally I wanted to find out how she was doing, but I also didn't want her to find out about my getting married via a second hand source, I just didn't feel like I could do that to her.
So I took the leap and contacted her. And after the time and the distance it was easier to see how the situation unfolded a couple of years ago was a product of the both of us, and not one of us. And to look at my own actions in a less justified way.
It wasn't a movie-esque reunion we were/ are probably still wary of each other. It's never going to be what it was before, but I'm glad we're talking now, I'm glad I got to see her and catch up in person this year. I'm glad that link was pulled thin, but didn't break.
I'm happy we are moving into an adult friendship and I'm happy that I stepped away from my pride and took the first step after all this time.
There is someone I have known since I was in the 2nd grade, but a couple of years ago we had a falling out. I don't think anyone was to blame, it was just time- we were different and going in different ways.
I wasn't sure if we would talk again, or what would happen, but it was pretty clear we needed a break from each other. So it surprised me that as it got closer to the wedding I wanted to talk to her. Generally I wanted to find out how she was doing, but I also didn't want her to find out about my getting married via a second hand source, I just didn't feel like I could do that to her.
So I took the leap and contacted her. And after the time and the distance it was easier to see how the situation unfolded a couple of years ago was a product of the both of us, and not one of us. And to look at my own actions in a less justified way.
It wasn't a movie-esque reunion we were/ are probably still wary of each other. It's never going to be what it was before, but I'm glad we're talking now, I'm glad I got to see her and catch up in person this year. I'm glad that link was pulled thin, but didn't break.
I'm happy we are moving into an adult friendship and I'm happy that I stepped away from my pride and took the first step after all this time.
Dec 23- Appreciate
Appreciate: For what did you find a new appreciation this year?
This is pretty menial, but I found an appreciation for Sadza
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sadza
I have been a long time fan of injera (holla to spending lunches at trafford out on cook st picking up ethiopian food!) which is a spongy flat bread thicker than a crepe that is both food and utensil. It's got a slightly sour taste to it that I love. If made properly, with teff, it's gluten free.
But this isn't about injera, it's about sadza which is totally different. The same in that it's also a food and utensil, but it is made with white cornmeal and looks like mashed potatoes on your plate.
The first time I had it I have to admit I was kind of creeped out, probably because the sadza got burned in the pot a little, not that we ate the burned part. And cleaning out a sadza pot is a LOT like cleaning out a poach[ed egg] pot (something I had to do every Sunday at the diner I worked at in throughout highschool.).
It also gave me a wicked stomach ache the first time I had it, I think because the more you eat it you like it "harder" which means, I think, slightly less cooked. But then the HB made it soft (like what you would give babies) and I think we got a different type of hufu (cornmeal) and I have to say I'm really coming to like it. Instead of wrapping your sadza around the food, you sort of dip it and grab it.
My next step is to learn how to make it for the HB, because it's his home food and I want to be able to cook his comfort for him. And hey, he learned how to cook a turkey this year so I think i can pony up.
This is pretty menial, but I found an appreciation for Sadza
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sadza
I have been a long time fan of injera (holla to spending lunches at trafford out on cook st picking up ethiopian food!) which is a spongy flat bread thicker than a crepe that is both food and utensil. It's got a slightly sour taste to it that I love. If made properly, with teff, it's gluten free.
But this isn't about injera, it's about sadza which is totally different. The same in that it's also a food and utensil, but it is made with white cornmeal and looks like mashed potatoes on your plate.
The first time I had it I have to admit I was kind of creeped out, probably because the sadza got burned in the pot a little, not that we ate the burned part. And cleaning out a sadza pot is a LOT like cleaning out a poach[ed egg] pot (something I had to do every Sunday at the diner I worked at in throughout highschool.).
It also gave me a wicked stomach ache the first time I had it, I think because the more you eat it you like it "harder" which means, I think, slightly less cooked. But then the HB made it soft (like what you would give babies) and I think we got a different type of hufu (cornmeal) and I have to say I'm really coming to like it. Instead of wrapping your sadza around the food, you sort of dip it and grab it.
My next step is to learn how to make it for the HB, because it's his home food and I want to be able to cook his comfort for him. And hey, he learned how to cook a turkey this year so I think i can pony up.
Dec 22- Song
Song: What has been your theme song this year? Have there been several? Make us a mix tape and tell us the meaning behind it.
Well, the wedding was pretty much giant mix-tape of awesome, if you ask me.
But this song carried me through, and it still does. I want to dance everytime I hear it, I can't WAIT to go and hear it when we visit the HB's family and dance to celebrate each other http://youtu.be/uV9X3656G4g
It just reminds me, it's not what you have; it's who you have with you that makes life amazing.
the runners up would be:
For the HB and I- http://youtu.be/Am0IFwjPyYA
For dad and I- http://youtu.be/mLbOBoa8vD8
For mum and I- http://youtu.be/mmwic9kFx2c
For don and I- http://youtu.be/ZSM3w1v-A_Y because I can't get this damn song out of my head now!
Well, the wedding was pretty much giant mix-tape of awesome, if you ask me.
But this song carried me through, and it still does. I want to dance everytime I hear it, I can't WAIT to go and hear it when we visit the HB's family and dance to celebrate each other http://youtu.be/uV9X3656G4g
It just reminds me, it's not what you have; it's who you have with you that makes life amazing.
the runners up would be:
For the HB and I- http://youtu.be/Am0IFwjPyYA
For dad and I- http://youtu.be/mLbOBoa8vD8
For mum and I- http://youtu.be/mmwic9kFx2c
For don and I- http://youtu.be/ZSM3w1v-A_Y because I can't get this damn song out of my head now!
Dec 21- Look
Look: Sometimes you are left standing on the outside looking in. As you stood there, on the other side of the glass, were you thankful for the boundary? Or do you wish you could’ve been on the action-side?
As a natural born historian, I'll have to say I generally enjoy being on the outside looking in, a lot more than I do being on the inside with the action. On the outside you can see what is happening, you can make out patterns, behaviours, you are an anthropologist and these people are merely your subjects.
It's probably more of a challenge for me to be more on the action side, to force myself to participate in a tangible way rather than sitting back logging with academic interest what is happening.
During the wedding, I was in the middle of things, in the thick of the action and it was weird, I don't think I've spent that long at a function without checking out and observing. Now I can only observe in retrospect, did I make a fool of myself? Maybe I shouldn't have not eaten and had all that wine, was I polite to everyone etc. etc.
But in the end, it's the experiences and those memories that make up your life, not the categorical observation of life happening around you. So whether I was ridiculous or not at the wedding (I think it was half and half!) it was happening to me and I was THERE for it, and that's something I'm proud of.
As a natural born historian, I'll have to say I generally enjoy being on the outside looking in, a lot more than I do being on the inside with the action. On the outside you can see what is happening, you can make out patterns, behaviours, you are an anthropologist and these people are merely your subjects.
It's probably more of a challenge for me to be more on the action side, to force myself to participate in a tangible way rather than sitting back logging with academic interest what is happening.
During the wedding, I was in the middle of things, in the thick of the action and it was weird, I don't think I've spent that long at a function without checking out and observing. Now I can only observe in retrospect, did I make a fool of myself? Maybe I shouldn't have not eaten and had all that wine, was I polite to everyone etc. etc.
But in the end, it's the experiences and those memories that make up your life, not the categorical observation of life happening around you. So whether I was ridiculous or not at the wedding (I think it was half and half!) it was happening to me and I was THERE for it, and that's something I'm proud of.
Dec 20- Stuff and things
Stuff and Things: What products have you discovered this year that you love? Tell us all about them, and why you love them. Become the celebrity spokesperson of whatever it is you like!
Oh man, this is a hard one because right now I'm pretty much annoyed with "stuff" after having listened to and seen stupid commercials for how your life/her life/his life will be vastly improved if you get that special someone (or heck, just forget the other person and buy it for yourself!) something for "the season of giving".
I'm pretty sure that's not what they had in mind when that saying was thought up. It's just all so blatant and obvious now that this is just another version of the gluttony of our society, that happiness can be found in a bag.
Sooo I can't really be a celebrity spokesperson, firstly because I dislike celebrities selling things like they honestly care about the product and not the paycheque that's asscociated with the pretending. (are you honestly telling me a hollywood star uses boxed hair colour???) and secondly, well- no one's paying me.
Oh man, this is a hard one because right now I'm pretty much annoyed with "stuff" after having listened to and seen stupid commercials for how your life/her life/his life will be vastly improved if you get that special someone (or heck, just forget the other person and buy it for yourself!) something for "the season of giving".
I'm pretty sure that's not what they had in mind when that saying was thought up. It's just all so blatant and obvious now that this is just another version of the gluttony of our society, that happiness can be found in a bag.
Sooo I can't really be a celebrity spokesperson, firstly because I dislike celebrities selling things like they honestly care about the product and not the paycheque that's asscociated with the pretending. (are you honestly telling me a hollywood star uses boxed hair colour???) and secondly, well- no one's paying me.
Dec 19-Crap
Crap: What was just absolute rubbish for you this year? What would you do to change that? Describe something, or some moment, that was just hopelessly awful, and tell us how it could (or could not) be made better.
Maybe I'm in too warm and fuzzy a mood, or it's too early in the morning, but I can't really pull anything out right now. I'm sure there were craptacular moments this past year, but nothing so horribly awful.
So there.
Maybe I'm in too warm and fuzzy a mood, or it's too early in the morning, but I can't really pull anything out right now. I'm sure there were craptacular moments this past year, but nothing so horribly awful.
So there.
Dec 18 1000 Words
1000 Words: There’s the old saying that a photo is worth 1,000 words. Give us a photo with that impact that sums up some significant event of your 2012, or give us 1000 words about a pivotal moment in 2012.
This picture can barely do justice to all that went into the day. But the flowers were given and designed by such a special friend, the jam was made by my mother, the label was designed by anothergreat friend and it was set up by a whole passel of friends who I can only thank time and time again for making it happen.
I would fill my 1000 words with thank you, over and over again.
This picture can barely do justice to all that went into the day. But the flowers were given and designed by such a special friend, the jam was made by my mother, the label was designed by anothergreat friend and it was set up by a whole passel of friends who I can only thank time and time again for making it happen.
I would fill my 1000 words with thank you, over and over again.
Dec 17- Surprise
Surprise: The most surprising thing that happened this year was…
I suppose it would be getting married. I mean that in itself wasn't surprising since it was on the table for the whole year, but if you had asked me two years ago at this time if I was going to be married in 2012 I would have probably laughed you out of town.
I hadn't reallly given getting married much thought in the past five years, after thinking about it compulsively and jealously for the previous four. I used to cast longing gazes at the rings of others, burst into tears at the announcement of an engagement. Smile through the anger when a friend or friends got engaged and married. But thankfully that changed and I just stopped caring or thinking about it very much. I was actually geniunely happy when good people got married.
And then one day it happend to me. Which doesn't mean it was or is the most amzing thing to ever happen to me. It could be, but I also hope for other amazing things. It just wasn't on my radar.
In the immortal words of Ferris Bueller "Life moves pretty fast. If you don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it."
I'm glad I stopped.
I suppose it would be getting married. I mean that in itself wasn't surprising since it was on the table for the whole year, but if you had asked me two years ago at this time if I was going to be married in 2012 I would have probably laughed you out of town.
I hadn't reallly given getting married much thought in the past five years, after thinking about it compulsively and jealously for the previous four. I used to cast longing gazes at the rings of others, burst into tears at the announcement of an engagement. Smile through the anger when a friend or friends got engaged and married. But thankfully that changed and I just stopped caring or thinking about it very much. I was actually geniunely happy when good people got married.
And then one day it happend to me. Which doesn't mean it was or is the most amzing thing to ever happen to me. It could be, but I also hope for other amazing things. It just wasn't on my radar.
In the immortal words of Ferris Bueller "Life moves pretty fast. If you don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it."
I'm glad I stopped.
Dec 16- Choice
Choice: Being an adult means making your own choices. What choices were the hardest to make this year?
I think that hardest choice this year has been choosing to take care of myself first. I'm not very good at doing that, but I'm trying to get better at it.
Sometimes this means hurting people's feelings so they can stop hurting me. Sometimes it means I need to choose not to hurt myself by my actions.
It's a lot of little choices that add up. And I'm working on making the right choice for myself so I can be the best to others.
I think that hardest choice this year has been choosing to take care of myself first. I'm not very good at doing that, but I'm trying to get better at it.
Sometimes this means hurting people's feelings so they can stop hurting me. Sometimes it means I need to choose not to hurt myself by my actions.
It's a lot of little choices that add up. And I'm working on making the right choice for myself so I can be the best to others.
Friday, December 28, 2012
Dec 15-Friendship
Friendship: What was it like for you to be a friend to others this year? Did you rekindle an old friendship? Strengthen a current friendship? Make friends with someone you didn’t think was “your type?”
There were the best of friends, there were the worst of friends.
There were the best of friends, there were the worst of friends.
Saturday, December 15, 2012
Dec 14-Family
December 14: Family: Did your role in the family shift or change over the past year? How? Why?
Since this is the year I got married, it was the year of family. Generally, it's been awesome. How family helped us this year was amazing. Even when I was banging my head against my desk or the HB because my dad drove/drives me nuts I am still so thankful they are who they are.
Now that I'm married, and we are our own family, it's a bit weird! Only in the sense that I have to switch allegiance, and in my close-knit family that changes things. It's natural and it's right and it is the way to build and keep creating a strong partnership, but it takes some getting used to.
I tell my parents and brother pretty much everything I have always been pretty open with them. Except for mutually decided "don't ask, don't tell" topics, they know wha gwan. So if I were having relationship problems or frustrations, it would be pretty normal for me to talk to them about it or about anything.
Now I feel like that has to change somewhat. I know they are there if I really need them and will always support me. But when it comes to my marriage there is one person I need to talk to first and that's the HB. It doesn't do us any favours if I'm constantly going back to my parents when I have an issue, or news- they can't do much for any situation but listen. I need to go to the source and we deal with it as a unit, a family.
I have a new first line of defence and I'm so thankful for my parents and my brother for being that to me for so many years, when I was alone or alone together with someone I didn't really trust. They stood by me, they listened (and in the case of my dad told me what to do). But now is the time to shift, to create new memories and forge new pathways of listening and understanding. I want to help build up what I have with the HB, not tear it down by going outwards.
It is the time to lay the foundations for the years ahead, and this is what I have been learning this year. I'm not perfect at it, but I'm so much more comfortable and trusting of it that I have ever been in my life.
Since this is the year I got married, it was the year of family. Generally, it's been awesome. How family helped us this year was amazing. Even when I was banging my head against my desk or the HB because my dad drove/drives me nuts I am still so thankful they are who they are.
Now that I'm married, and we are our own family, it's a bit weird! Only in the sense that I have to switch allegiance, and in my close-knit family that changes things. It's natural and it's right and it is the way to build and keep creating a strong partnership, but it takes some getting used to.
I tell my parents and brother pretty much everything I have always been pretty open with them. Except for mutually decided "don't ask, don't tell" topics, they know wha gwan. So if I were having relationship problems or frustrations, it would be pretty normal for me to talk to them about it or about anything.
Now I feel like that has to change somewhat. I know they are there if I really need them and will always support me. But when it comes to my marriage there is one person I need to talk to first and that's the HB. It doesn't do us any favours if I'm constantly going back to my parents when I have an issue, or news- they can't do much for any situation but listen. I need to go to the source and we deal with it as a unit, a family.
I have a new first line of defence and I'm so thankful for my parents and my brother for being that to me for so many years, when I was alone or alone together with someone I didn't really trust. They stood by me, they listened (and in the case of my dad told me what to do). But now is the time to shift, to create new memories and forge new pathways of listening and understanding. I want to help build up what I have with the HB, not tear it down by going outwards.
It is the time to lay the foundations for the years ahead, and this is what I have been learning this year. I'm not perfect at it, but I'm so much more comfortable and trusting of it that I have ever been in my life.
Dec 13- Do-Over
Do-Over: Of the things that happened this year, if you had the chance to do X all over again, what would it be?
What a question! This year was a pretty great year. There were ups and downs, but the balance is tipped really far in the ups.
I really try to live without regrets so what I would do over again is my honeymoon. Yes, that's right I would like to go back and do over our 12 days in Hawaii. I don't think I'd like to do too much different, maybe more snorkelling, maybe spend a night in Hilo and drive to Volcano from there. But the rest of it, the days at the beach, the walks into Kailua, the sneaky matinee, the days in the pool I would do that all over again just as it was.
Sometimes I think I should have done more, we should have done ALL THE THINGS while we were there. But it's important to take a break once in a while. And if you can't lounge at the pool all day on your honeymoon, when can you take that time?
People would come in from wherever and while parking their car tell us what they did that day. Ziplining! Scuba diving! Helicopter rides! and they would ask us what we did, and we'd smile (a little foolishly like you are supposed to on your honeymoon) and say- nothing! They seemed disappointed sometimes, but maybe they were just jealous.
What a question! This year was a pretty great year. There were ups and downs, but the balance is tipped really far in the ups.
I really try to live without regrets so what I would do over again is my honeymoon. Yes, that's right I would like to go back and do over our 12 days in Hawaii. I don't think I'd like to do too much different, maybe more snorkelling, maybe spend a night in Hilo and drive to Volcano from there. But the rest of it, the days at the beach, the walks into Kailua, the sneaky matinee, the days in the pool I would do that all over again just as it was.
Sometimes I think I should have done more, we should have done ALL THE THINGS while we were there. But it's important to take a break once in a while. And if you can't lounge at the pool all day on your honeymoon, when can you take that time?
People would come in from wherever and while parking their car tell us what they did that day. Ziplining! Scuba diving! Helicopter rides! and they would ask us what we did, and we'd smile (a little foolishly like you are supposed to on your honeymoon) and say- nothing! They seemed disappointed sometimes, but maybe they were just jealous.
Dec 12- Unexpected Passion
Unexpected Passion: What new hobby or interest piqued your passion this year? Or did you think about an old passion in a new way?
Truthfully, not a lot really piqued my passion this year and I felt its absence. I gave a speech at a wedding last month for a dear dear friend who is one of these people who does live life with passion and creativity.
When I was thinking about the speech and her I realized that I wanted to speak to that and not just give a compilation of antidotes from our years of friendship. Because I think it is amazing that someone can live such a creative life. It takes a huge amount of effort and being open to a lack of stability, I wonder if I could ever make such a leap.
I am very academic, I like to see things through the lens of hows and whys. I am not much of a doer, but perhaps my need to know the hows and the whys of being creative is because I'm searching to a be a who. One who is creative.
This year I realized that not having a passion, or an outlet for my creativity makes me kind of bored with myself. That half thought/half dreamt ideas that emerge when I'm almost asleep are not enough to keep me going.
I need to take those ideas and make them real. That stories can be for more than just entertaining Murray (my very adventurous bathroom spider) while I'm showering. I CAN be creative, I know I am somewhere in there.
I don't think I'll ever live a fully creative life like my friend; I don't have her strength, but I can inject some passion back into my life.
Truthfully, not a lot really piqued my passion this year and I felt its absence. I gave a speech at a wedding last month for a dear dear friend who is one of these people who does live life with passion and creativity.
When I was thinking about the speech and her I realized that I wanted to speak to that and not just give a compilation of antidotes from our years of friendship. Because I think it is amazing that someone can live such a creative life. It takes a huge amount of effort and being open to a lack of stability, I wonder if I could ever make such a leap.
I am very academic, I like to see things through the lens of hows and whys. I am not much of a doer, but perhaps my need to know the hows and the whys of being creative is because I'm searching to a be a who. One who is creative.
This year I realized that not having a passion, or an outlet for my creativity makes me kind of bored with myself. That half thought/half dreamt ideas that emerge when I'm almost asleep are not enough to keep me going.
I need to take those ideas and make them real. That stories can be for more than just entertaining Murray (my very adventurous bathroom spider) while I'm showering. I CAN be creative, I know I am somewhere in there.
I don't think I'll ever live a fully creative life like my friend; I don't have her strength, but I can inject some passion back into my life.
Dec 11- Small Pleasures
Small Pleasures: What small pleasures did you discover this year?
By far the best was dancing and singing in the kitchen. I think this has a lot to do with having a kitchen big enough for that to happen. And having someone else there who is keen to take a spin around the "dance floor" with me.
But there is something so wonderfully cheesy about interrupting dinner to dance for a bit.
By far the best was dancing and singing in the kitchen. I think this has a lot to do with having a kitchen big enough for that to happen. And having someone else there who is keen to take a spin around the "dance floor" with me.
But there is something so wonderfully cheesy about interrupting dinner to dance for a bit.
Thursday, December 13, 2012
Dec 10- Scars
Scars: They leave marks, and sometimes you can only take what you can carry. What will you, by choice or by chance, carry into 2013?
This is a tough one. There are things I want to talk about and yet, I don't. I was sitting down to write this and looking at my cat, and then thought- by far the most scars I'll be carrying over are scars from him.
Then I went to look up the definition of scar for some deep thoughts inspiration and one of the first pages is the Second Chance Animal Rescue Society- clearly my topic has been choosen.
Not all scars have to originate in something bad. While the scars I'll carry from the bites and scratches of the young master hurt when I got them they will only remind me of love.
I resisted getting a cat for a long time. I wasn't ready after my last one died and then I was too broke to really be able to properly care for one. I turned down two cats, one a stray near my old place and one from a shelter. While there to help a friend pick out a cat one of their "troubled" cats took a liking to me. She was lovely and I felt awful having to leave her because her chance of getting picked was slim. But I knew, at that time it just wasn't right for me and I wanted to be able to afford the good life for any pet of mine.
Once the HB and I moved in together, it seemed like it was a good time to start building the family. In fact we picked up Monts late in 2011, so this is our first full year with him at the helm.
I can't express how happy having a pet makes me. Those moments when he curls up into my arms for a cuddle, how he knows if I'm unhappy or upset and comes to make sure I'm ok. When he reaches out one paw to touch me while he sleeps.
And then there are the moments of frustration- when he launches himself at my face, tipping over the Xmas tree, the annoying habit of pushing things off the bedside table.
Having a cat again has changed me, and changed my lifestyle. We can't just go away for a long period of time without warning or preparations. And being away is hard. Nothing like sitting on your honeymoon and looking at your spouse and saying "I miss the cat". Fortunately he said it first!
The saying "don't bite the hand that feeds you" pretty much doesn't exist in cat world. I think it might even be a requirement. But as I sit here and look at those scars, and look at this little fur ball that fills my heart and my life with so much joy I know these scars are proudly carried into the new year.
This is a tough one. There are things I want to talk about and yet, I don't. I was sitting down to write this and looking at my cat, and then thought- by far the most scars I'll be carrying over are scars from him.
Then I went to look up the definition of scar for some deep thoughts inspiration and one of the first pages is the Second Chance Animal Rescue Society- clearly my topic has been choosen.
Not all scars have to originate in something bad. While the scars I'll carry from the bites and scratches of the young master hurt when I got them they will only remind me of love.
I resisted getting a cat for a long time. I wasn't ready after my last one died and then I was too broke to really be able to properly care for one. I turned down two cats, one a stray near my old place and one from a shelter. While there to help a friend pick out a cat one of their "troubled" cats took a liking to me. She was lovely and I felt awful having to leave her because her chance of getting picked was slim. But I knew, at that time it just wasn't right for me and I wanted to be able to afford the good life for any pet of mine.
Once the HB and I moved in together, it seemed like it was a good time to start building the family. In fact we picked up Monts late in 2011, so this is our first full year with him at the helm.
I can't express how happy having a pet makes me. Those moments when he curls up into my arms for a cuddle, how he knows if I'm unhappy or upset and comes to make sure I'm ok. When he reaches out one paw to touch me while he sleeps.
And then there are the moments of frustration- when he launches himself at my face, tipping over the Xmas tree, the annoying habit of pushing things off the bedside table.
Having a cat again has changed me, and changed my lifestyle. We can't just go away for a long period of time without warning or preparations. And being away is hard. Nothing like sitting on your honeymoon and looking at your spouse and saying "I miss the cat". Fortunately he said it first!
The saying "don't bite the hand that feeds you" pretty much doesn't exist in cat world. I think it might even be a requirement. But as I sit here and look at those scars, and look at this little fur ball that fills my heart and my life with so much joy I know these scars are proudly carried into the new year.
Sunday, December 9, 2012
Dec 9- The Plank
The Plank: It has been said that you must learn to take care of yourself before you can be effective at taking care of others. How did you take care of yourself in 2012? How will you take care of yourself in 2013?
This is a big topic for me. I am not very good at taking care of myself, or putting myself first. Part of the reason I tend towards helping others is so I can ignore myself.
Even now I don't want to write this out. This year I have been working on doing things for myself, that put me first. I made a decision to only buy shoes that fit and that are well made and good for my feet.
I took a job that is going to be better for me than what I had, even if it meant I was viewed as "letting the team down".
I am trying not to spend money on junky, cheap things but to save up and buy a quality item.
I am trying to watch what I put into and on my body. I am working on reducing the chemicals that we use in the house for cleaning, in our personal products and in our food.
See what I just did there? I started in on the we's, I had a paragraph going that was all we this and we that. But this post is about ME, stay on topic!
Next year I am going to continue working on taking care of myself. I want to have kids soon, but before that happens I need to make sure I have a strong self built up. I want to be able to teach my sons and daughters that self care is a valid investment, it's not a chore. And that means I have to look at it as a valid investment first.
So, I'm going to learn how to blow dry my hair. This might seem kind of ridiculous, but it's a big one for me. I'm not all that keen on my hair, and I tend to ignore it, I don't style it or get it cut very often. It just is. But this year I am going to learn how to use a freaking hair dryer and have nice looking hair. I'm going to get my hair cut every four months (also something hard for me- I can go years between cuts).
I am also going to research natural make up, so that what I am putting on my face isn't harming me.
I am going to work on my weight. I know we're all not allowed to go on about our weight and being fat, but the fact is I am fat. It doesn't mean that fat is who I am, it doesn't necessarily define me as a person or my deeds. But it's there, and it's more there this year than ever.
I will never be skinny, sometimes I think that and I feel released from the pressure. And sometimes I think that and I feel so sad and horrified that I will never get to experience thinness. But I can be healthier and I know I can make changes that I can stick to.
All of these investments into myself will, I hope, also help me keep better boundaries around the help I can give others and ensure I serve myself first.
This is a big topic for me. I am not very good at taking care of myself, or putting myself first. Part of the reason I tend towards helping others is so I can ignore myself.
Even now I don't want to write this out. This year I have been working on doing things for myself, that put me first. I made a decision to only buy shoes that fit and that are well made and good for my feet.
I took a job that is going to be better for me than what I had, even if it meant I was viewed as "letting the team down".
I am trying not to spend money on junky, cheap things but to save up and buy a quality item.
I am trying to watch what I put into and on my body. I am working on reducing the chemicals that we use in the house for cleaning, in our personal products and in our food.
See what I just did there? I started in on the we's, I had a paragraph going that was all we this and we that. But this post is about ME, stay on topic!
Next year I am going to continue working on taking care of myself. I want to have kids soon, but before that happens I need to make sure I have a strong self built up. I want to be able to teach my sons and daughters that self care is a valid investment, it's not a chore. And that means I have to look at it as a valid investment first.
So, I'm going to learn how to blow dry my hair. This might seem kind of ridiculous, but it's a big one for me. I'm not all that keen on my hair, and I tend to ignore it, I don't style it or get it cut very often. It just is. But this year I am going to learn how to use a freaking hair dryer and have nice looking hair. I'm going to get my hair cut every four months (also something hard for me- I can go years between cuts).
I am also going to research natural make up, so that what I am putting on my face isn't harming me.
I am going to work on my weight. I know we're all not allowed to go on about our weight and being fat, but the fact is I am fat. It doesn't mean that fat is who I am, it doesn't necessarily define me as a person or my deeds. But it's there, and it's more there this year than ever.
I will never be skinny, sometimes I think that and I feel released from the pressure. And sometimes I think that and I feel so sad and horrified that I will never get to experience thinness. But I can be healthier and I know I can make changes that I can stick to.
All of these investments into myself will, I hope, also help me keep better boundaries around the help I can give others and ensure I serve myself first.
Dec 8- Art
Art: What was the most moving piece of art that you saw/experienced this year? This could mean a painting or a sculpture, or a performance you took in, or even a book that you read – tell us about the kind of art you encountered, and the way that it moved you.
The fact that it's taking me a while to think about this leads me to feel like I didn't see enough Art this year. I used to spend years immersed in art, that was all I would think about.
Now my profession (dare I even say a career?) is something so far from the creative world that I realize I'm going to have to make much more of an effort to inject creativity and art into my life.
What I saw this year that really moved me was the Petroglyph's found in Volcano National Park. We had to walk out for a mile in a barren landscape to the area where the petroglyph's were. These were carved by the ancient Hawaiians, part of the tradition was to carve little round holes where mothers would put the umbilical cord of their children, for protection and to ground them to the earth.
It reminded me that people of all time want to be remembered, to make their mark in the world, and that we can view history through something more than the wars and the battles that were fought, to view it through the creative forces not the destructive ones.
I need a lot more art in my life, this year I want to change that, and I want to change my relationship to art, from being a detached observer to active participant.
The fact that it's taking me a while to think about this leads me to feel like I didn't see enough Art this year. I used to spend years immersed in art, that was all I would think about.
Now my profession (dare I even say a career?) is something so far from the creative world that I realize I'm going to have to make much more of an effort to inject creativity and art into my life.
What I saw this year that really moved me was the Petroglyph's found in Volcano National Park. We had to walk out for a mile in a barren landscape to the area where the petroglyph's were. These were carved by the ancient Hawaiians, part of the tradition was to carve little round holes where mothers would put the umbilical cord of their children, for protection and to ground them to the earth.
It reminded me that people of all time want to be remembered, to make their mark in the world, and that we can view history through something more than the wars and the battles that were fought, to view it through the creative forces not the destructive ones.
I need a lot more art in my life, this year I want to change that, and I want to change my relationship to art, from being a detached observer to active participant.
Saturday, December 8, 2012
Dec 7- Feast
Feast: Hopefully you’ve had more than one spectacular meal in 2012, but what is the first that comes to mind? Were you surrounded by family at the dining room table? Sitting on a bench by the lake? Bring us there
I would say the dinner we took my parents to when they were out for a visit. The HB did some research on local restaurants and we decided to go with Cowbell, just down the street from us.
The food was spectacular, they do their in house butchering and curing and everything else is quite local. We were there for an earlier dinner so we had the restaurant to pretty much to ourselves. We paired it with a beautiful red and some great conversation.
What stands out the most is this being a meal out with my parents but really it was four grown ups out together. I've been on grown up footing with my parents for quite a few years now, they are parents but also best friends. However, adding the HB in has changed the dynamic slightly. I have never had a partner that my parents got along with so well and respected so much and that is just so easy for the four of us to be together.
I remember being younger and watching my parents and my grandparents at the table, or out and everyone got along so well and you knew that this was all family, but it was also friends coming together and wanting that for myself some day.
And now I can see, that this has happened. That meal was delicious and it felt great to be able to treat my parents to a nice dinner when they have given so much. A dinner ending not in dishes, but a warm spring evening stroll through the neighbourhood was the perfect meal.
I would say the dinner we took my parents to when they were out for a visit. The HB did some research on local restaurants and we decided to go with Cowbell, just down the street from us.
The food was spectacular, they do their in house butchering and curing and everything else is quite local. We were there for an earlier dinner so we had the restaurant to pretty much to ourselves. We paired it with a beautiful red and some great conversation.
What stands out the most is this being a meal out with my parents but really it was four grown ups out together. I've been on grown up footing with my parents for quite a few years now, they are parents but also best friends. However, adding the HB in has changed the dynamic slightly. I have never had a partner that my parents got along with so well and respected so much and that is just so easy for the four of us to be together.
I remember being younger and watching my parents and my grandparents at the table, or out and everyone got along so well and you knew that this was all family, but it was also friends coming together and wanting that for myself some day.
And now I can see, that this has happened. That meal was delicious and it felt great to be able to treat my parents to a nice dinner when they have given so much. A dinner ending not in dishes, but a warm spring evening stroll through the neighbourhood was the perfect meal.
Dec 6- Intentions
Intention: What were some of your mantras from 2012 and how did you come by them? Will they remain the same for next year – if not, what new ones will you set?
I guess the biggest one is "you can't control other people". The other would be "just get through it".
Being in a relationship is a lot of trust to put in someone. You have to trust them to be a lot of things and with a lot of things that are dear to you. That can be really hard to manage when people you have put your trust in before have taken that trust and put it through the wringer.
But at a certain point you have to let people be exactly who they have to be/ who they are and make your judgments about them based on what they do. Not what you wanted them to do.
I think this mantra will continue on next year because it's something I slip and slide away from and it ties into having better boundaries for myself.
The second matra "just get through it" is one I can happily discard this coming year because- I'm through it! Done, finis, exit stage left.
I knew having a wedding was going to be stressful and suck up way too much of my time, but I also knew it was just one day and it was going to make members of my family so happy to be there and to be a part of that it wasn't something I could avoid. Particularly in a family light on weddings... Since I was the first of the immediate family (including cousins) of this generation to get hitched I had to take one for the team.
So it wasn't something I wanted, or needed, but I just had to get through it to make a lot of people very happy.
And it was worth it, in the end. It was one day, it wasn't THE one day, it wasn't the defining moment of my life to date but it was good fun and I was surrounded by loved ones and that in itself made it worth it.
And of course the two week vacation afterwards on a tropical isle in the South Pacific helped immensely.
So here we are, through it on the other side. I don't think I would set an outright mantra, I like to see the liet motif that will develop throughout the year.
I guess the biggest one is "you can't control other people". The other would be "just get through it".
Being in a relationship is a lot of trust to put in someone. You have to trust them to be a lot of things and with a lot of things that are dear to you. That can be really hard to manage when people you have put your trust in before have taken that trust and put it through the wringer.
But at a certain point you have to let people be exactly who they have to be/ who they are and make your judgments about them based on what they do. Not what you wanted them to do.
I think this mantra will continue on next year because it's something I slip and slide away from and it ties into having better boundaries for myself.
The second matra "just get through it" is one I can happily discard this coming year because- I'm through it! Done, finis, exit stage left.
I knew having a wedding was going to be stressful and suck up way too much of my time, but I also knew it was just one day and it was going to make members of my family so happy to be there and to be a part of that it wasn't something I could avoid. Particularly in a family light on weddings... Since I was the first of the immediate family (including cousins) of this generation to get hitched I had to take one for the team.
So it wasn't something I wanted, or needed, but I just had to get through it to make a lot of people very happy.
And it was worth it, in the end. It was one day, it wasn't THE one day, it wasn't the defining moment of my life to date but it was good fun and I was surrounded by loved ones and that in itself made it worth it.
And of course the two week vacation afterwards on a tropical isle in the South Pacific helped immensely.
So here we are, through it on the other side. I don't think I would set an outright mantra, I like to see the liet motif that will develop throughout the year.
Dec 5- Letting Go
Letting go: For next year, I’m letting go of…
the need to placate other people.
I took major strides this year in putting up boundaries for myself and doing things that are going to benefit me, not necessarily other people.
I recently got a permanent position in my job! Finally, after two years of little or no work and one year of contract work. It is not within the department I started in. And my manager begged me not to go, promising a permanent position in her department would be opening up soon.
But the thing was, my department wasn't a good fit for me. It often felt exclusionary and way too much like high school for my liking. The work I was doing was ok, but not overly stimulating and I was becoming the go to person about everything from finding staples for the printer to minor computer programs on top of all the job related duties I had. And I was really starting to feel resentful, like whenever Sally would get a computer upgrade and instead of googling or help menuing where anything was, she would interrupt me and my work.
Now part of this is my problem with not being able to say no and not help people but it was still breeding some resentment into my every day life.
A position posted in a new department, it's a new position as the department is growing so I will be the first to really set this up, and I can train to move up into a more senior position. On their dime. It's the right move for me but I still hesitated at letting down my manager. She is one of the best managers I've ever worked with. Not working with her saddens me a little. But staying in a position that I could see myself coming to resent, with little room for advancement would make me a lot sadder for a lot longer.
Now that I have a family I can't exactly do all the things that are only good for me, but I'm learning that when I put myself first I'm much more able to be a better spouse, a better friend, a better worker. Which is something my spouse has taught me, and endorses in me.
So it's time to let go of doing solely for other people and ignoring myself. I matter to other people in the world and I should matter to me.
the need to placate other people.
I took major strides this year in putting up boundaries for myself and doing things that are going to benefit me, not necessarily other people.
I recently got a permanent position in my job! Finally, after two years of little or no work and one year of contract work. It is not within the department I started in. And my manager begged me not to go, promising a permanent position in her department would be opening up soon.
But the thing was, my department wasn't a good fit for me. It often felt exclusionary and way too much like high school for my liking. The work I was doing was ok, but not overly stimulating and I was becoming the go to person about everything from finding staples for the printer to minor computer programs on top of all the job related duties I had. And I was really starting to feel resentful, like whenever Sally would get a computer upgrade and instead of googling or help menuing where anything was, she would interrupt me and my work.
Now part of this is my problem with not being able to say no and not help people but it was still breeding some resentment into my every day life.
A position posted in a new department, it's a new position as the department is growing so I will be the first to really set this up, and I can train to move up into a more senior position. On their dime. It's the right move for me but I still hesitated at letting down my manager. She is one of the best managers I've ever worked with. Not working with her saddens me a little. But staying in a position that I could see myself coming to resent, with little room for advancement would make me a lot sadder for a lot longer.
Now that I have a family I can't exactly do all the things that are only good for me, but I'm learning that when I put myself first I'm much more able to be a better spouse, a better friend, a better worker. Which is something my spouse has taught me, and endorses in me.
So it's time to let go of doing solely for other people and ignoring myself. I matter to other people in the world and I should matter to me.
Dec 4- Place
Place: What places anchored you this year? Or were you in search of new places and spaces to call your own and call home? Describe the place you love and why it means so much to you.
The place I love, being curled up in bed with my two boys close to me. There isn't a happier moment I can think of. But it's not tied to any one place. As long as they are there with me, I feel anchored.
This year was definitely more home bound than previous years, despite the traveling. In many ways this year was quite patterned, go to work, come home, go out in the neighbourhood, rinse, repeat. With the wedding planning being pretty high stress, a change in routine didn't seem like a great idea. And it's interesting to start to put down roots and to be living with someone again and want to be at home and creating that space. After years of living in a basement apartment, to finally live above ground again with a lot of space at my disposal means I spend a lot of time in my living room, just enjoying.
Although this years top place award would go to the impromptu family get together the night before the wedding. In the campground we spent many summers camping in with my grandparents, and to have one of those grandparents still there. We sat around a the fire, talking and laughing, the summer sun and heat setting and the trees high above us. Having my whole family there in that place at that moment was what made my year, that is what I worked so hard to achieve.
The place I love, being curled up in bed with my two boys close to me. There isn't a happier moment I can think of. But it's not tied to any one place. As long as they are there with me, I feel anchored.
This year was definitely more home bound than previous years, despite the traveling. In many ways this year was quite patterned, go to work, come home, go out in the neighbourhood, rinse, repeat. With the wedding planning being pretty high stress, a change in routine didn't seem like a great idea. And it's interesting to start to put down roots and to be living with someone again and want to be at home and creating that space. After years of living in a basement apartment, to finally live above ground again with a lot of space at my disposal means I spend a lot of time in my living room, just enjoying.
Although this years top place award would go to the impromptu family get together the night before the wedding. In the campground we spent many summers camping in with my grandparents, and to have one of those grandparents still there. We sat around a the fire, talking and laughing, the summer sun and heat setting and the trees high above us. Having my whole family there in that place at that moment was what made my year, that is what I worked so hard to achieve.
Dec. 3- Beautiful things
Beautiful Things: What brought beauty into your life this year? Was it a tangible thing or something intangible? Tell us about it in detail.
There was a lot of beauty in my year. I would say it ten to one outweighed anything ugly that happened. I went to beautiful places, I saw beautiful people, I heard beautiful sounds and smelled beautiful smells.
Being in the moment brings out the beauty in the world for me. And when I can stop and really be where I am and what I am doing, anything that was negative can be turned around.
For instance, today I was going to a meeting away from my house at 9am. I left the house at 8.40.. I didn't make it in time, realizing as I was almost there that I needed to have been there at 8.30 and showing up at quarter past nine wouldn't work.
It's cold and grey and rainy today, there I was out of bed early on Saturday (but not early enough!) having missed the meeting standing on the side walk starting to curse myself for not having it together.
But then I stopped and said, well I'll walk up to the subway, I grabbed a V8 and then decided, well I'll just walk to the next stop, I haven't been in the neighbourhood for while and why not. The next stop brought me to the park and instead of turning left into the subway I crossed the street and headed into the park.
As I walked through the park with the rain coming down I started to feel refreshed and alive and realized again, how beautiful it is in the park. And then I stopped, alone, in the rain and just listened to the sounds a forest makes on a day like today. And it is a beautiful cacophony of sound. Then I noticed a dry patch under a cedar tree, and remembered that there is always a safe haven in a forest, that I could take shelter if I needed a break from the rain.
Those are the most beautiful moments of the year, when I'm able to pull myself out of something negative and turn it into a challenge or a memory.
There was a lot of beauty in my year. I would say it ten to one outweighed anything ugly that happened. I went to beautiful places, I saw beautiful people, I heard beautiful sounds and smelled beautiful smells.
Being in the moment brings out the beauty in the world for me. And when I can stop and really be where I am and what I am doing, anything that was negative can be turned around.
For instance, today I was going to a meeting away from my house at 9am. I left the house at 8.40.. I didn't make it in time, realizing as I was almost there that I needed to have been there at 8.30 and showing up at quarter past nine wouldn't work.
It's cold and grey and rainy today, there I was out of bed early on Saturday (but not early enough!) having missed the meeting standing on the side walk starting to curse myself for not having it together.
But then I stopped and said, well I'll walk up to the subway, I grabbed a V8 and then decided, well I'll just walk to the next stop, I haven't been in the neighbourhood for while and why not. The next stop brought me to the park and instead of turning left into the subway I crossed the street and headed into the park.
As I walked through the park with the rain coming down I started to feel refreshed and alive and realized again, how beautiful it is in the park. And then I stopped, alone, in the rain and just listened to the sounds a forest makes on a day like today. And it is a beautiful cacophony of sound. Then I noticed a dry patch under a cedar tree, and remembered that there is always a safe haven in a forest, that I could take shelter if I needed a break from the rain.
Those are the most beautiful moments of the year, when I'm able to pull myself out of something negative and turn it into a challenge or a memory.
Friday, December 7, 2012
Reverb Dec 2-Help
Help: Asking for help can be the hardest thing we ever do. When and how did you ask for help? Alternatively, did someone ask you for help and how did it play out?
I get asked for help a lot. And I find it very hard not to help someone who is in need or in crisis. I really do like to see people happy. But this year I have come to wonder if my helping people has also been a way for me to feel removed from a situation, to be the calm cool and collected helper means I don't have to or *can't* put my emotions in there with things. Someone has to keep their head above water.
I did a lot of asking for help this year, in a variety of ways. I would sometimes be very vocal (ahem- bossy) in what I needed help with, particularly with planning a wedding across the country. There were times when I wasn't vocal about the help I needed but desperately wanted someone to say, hey let me help you out, to realize the edge I was about to fall off of.
Receiving help was a mixed bag. There were times when my explicit requests for help were met with crickets, with something completely unhelpful, there were times when it was completely ignored and there are times when it was met and exceeded my wildest ideas.
The help I received around the wedding, particularly the day before and the day of made me realize a lot of things. It made me realize that I have a group of friends that are undeniably amazing. They came in, I would even say swooped in, and saved the day-literally. They took control and helped me, when I was unable to help myself anymore. Who took over joyously and uncomplainingly and perfectly.
It gave me pause, after months of trying to help myself and planning a wedding with no immediate support and feeling so up against a wall that a group of women could come in and help me out like that and know that's just what we DO for each other. It was a good reminder on what true friendship is. It's not paying lip service to each other, or even being in touch all the time. It's being there when you are needed and doing what needs to be done without expectations of laurels but because you love that friend.
I try hard to conduct my friendships like that, with that fierce commitment. Giving help may feel empowering to me, but it's the receiving of help that makes me humble and fills me with gratitude.
I get asked for help a lot. And I find it very hard not to help someone who is in need or in crisis. I really do like to see people happy. But this year I have come to wonder if my helping people has also been a way for me to feel removed from a situation, to be the calm cool and collected helper means I don't have to or *can't* put my emotions in there with things. Someone has to keep their head above water.
I did a lot of asking for help this year, in a variety of ways. I would sometimes be very vocal (ahem- bossy) in what I needed help with, particularly with planning a wedding across the country. There were times when I wasn't vocal about the help I needed but desperately wanted someone to say, hey let me help you out, to realize the edge I was about to fall off of.
Receiving help was a mixed bag. There were times when my explicit requests for help were met with crickets, with something completely unhelpful, there were times when it was completely ignored and there are times when it was met and exceeded my wildest ideas.
The help I received around the wedding, particularly the day before and the day of made me realize a lot of things. It made me realize that I have a group of friends that are undeniably amazing. They came in, I would even say swooped in, and saved the day-literally. They took control and helped me, when I was unable to help myself anymore. Who took over joyously and uncomplainingly and perfectly.
It gave me pause, after months of trying to help myself and planning a wedding with no immediate support and feeling so up against a wall that a group of women could come in and help me out like that and know that's just what we DO for each other. It was a good reminder on what true friendship is. It's not paying lip service to each other, or even being in touch all the time. It's being there when you are needed and doing what needs to be done without expectations of laurels but because you love that friend.
I try hard to conduct my friendships like that, with that fierce commitment. Giving help may feel empowering to me, but it's the receiving of help that makes me humble and fills me with gratitude.
Reverb 2012- Dec 1 Where it Began
Where it began: Review and reflect – how did 2012 begin for you? Tell us how the year kicked off; start your renewal by beginning again.
The year of 2012 kicked off pretty quietly. I was home by myself for most of NYE as the HB had to do some work. He managed to make it home just before midnight. I think I watched Lord of the Rings.
While i like a good party I find these forced moments of "joy" slightly annoying, want to go out to celebrate or have dinner to celebrate, well let's just charge you double because it's New Years Eve... these years I've been more keen to either spend it with a couple of friends or just by myself.
The year may have started of quietly, but it was anything but a quiet year. There was much ado about a day going on for pretty much the whole year. And then after that is was much ado about my friends day! The year of days, that's what this will be known for.
So it's been a good year, a year of changes and adjustment, of additions and losses, good and bad, ups and downs. Really, it's been a year just like any other with wonderful moments and depressing moments. And the gamut in between moments. I'm very happy this year happened and very happy that it's now part of family lore.
Reverb 2012
I am going to be doing Reverb again this year. Last December was far to crazy with work for me to think straight.
I'm playing catch up and will also just be trying to not over think my posts!
Let it begin.
Link to the site that runs Reverb
I'm playing catch up and will also just be trying to not over think my posts!
Let it begin.
Link to the site that runs Reverb
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
