OH. Hi there

It's been a while. Almost a year in fact!

Hi!

And what a year it has been. Dramatic changes are afoot and some have already marched on by.

To recap, and I guess I should start with the biggies:

I got engaged! To the most wonderful man I know (except for you Dad!)- the HB. He does amazing things, like clean the bathroom and dust, and love me even when I'm being a jerk, he talks to my friends and family and suffered through thoroughly enjoyed a trip out west to meet everyone. Essentially he's what I always wanted and hoped for in my heart of hearts.

Funny thing is when I was actually confronted with what I wanted I almost threw it back. But the HB is nothing if not persistent and somewhat sneaky. Sneakier than me even, waaaay sneakier than me (truth be told). We entered into a "formal agreement" over bbqing about getting married next summer. And boy did he let me think it was all my idea, the force is strong with this one. Pretty much if you can angle me into thinking it's all my idea, I'll do it.

So the "formal agreement" was cemented with a Christmas morning proposal on bended knee with my beautiful custom made ring. (thus ensuring this Scrooge McDuck would forever have a soft spot for Christmas)

Since we were under a "formal agreement" we decided it was probably a good idea to get shacked up. And the universe smiled upon us, it is funny- when things are right, they are easy. A friend of mine was in  (rental) possession of a beautiful semi-detached in Parkdale. And she decided the time was right for her to quit our Mean City for the last time. (follow her at Illumination Magazine for some wonderful writing) She passed the torch over to us, we are the now proud renters of a two level half house! Many of you (or the two of you who read this) know I have been a basement dweller for the past 4 years. We still have a basement with no windows (the man cave) but there is an upstairs! I have a "sitting room" and windows! And a wee back patio we plan to transform this year.

I miss my old neighbourhood, it's lazy charm, my big backyard and days spent watching the trees. I miss the junction and the good neighbour and bloor west village. But I am now closer to the Ocean/Lake, closer to the park and in the middle of a very happening hood that we are still discovering. And despite it's proximity to Queen St. it's a quiet house. We live across from a park, within walking distance to an all year farmers Market, it is a beautiful and a family oriented neighbourhood to our North and hipster heaven to our South.

That's right, hipsters I am in you*. Often called "Little Williamsburg" there is no shortage of guys sporting skinny jeans and/or harem pant jeans, black rimmed glasses, weird facial hair and plaid shirts.  I may be succumbing slightly and have purchased a bright green fur hooded jacket (c'mon $20 what a steal!) but I also work on Bay St. so I think it's a pretty good balance.

*I believe Gwen will remember a time of me drunkenly shrieking F**K Parkdale!! Ahh life is pretty funny.

I do not miss living in a moldy basement or the racoon mafia that liked to use my one window as a toilet area.

So here we are! It is year end, I'm getting used to living with someone else (ie- sharing things- still sucks I tell ya, but I'm getting there).

After a year struggling to enter the work force I finally did on a year long contract starting in July, it's been interesting. It's not my calling, but at this moment it is paying the bills and that is what I need.

Being DINKs (Double Income No Kids) was the perfect opportunity to expand our little family to include Montague aka Monty aka The Little Gaffer aka "quit it shithead". He's from a shelter and now I think 7 months old really fits in with us. The HB and Monty can often be caught snoozing on the couch together.

So onwards to 2012- where I will be getting married, taking a honeymoon(!), working on expanding our family (and in turn expanding me, I suppose), celebrating with friends and family alike and getting to show our out Easty's my little slice of the West Coast.

There is so much to do, but I'm feeling positive and strong and that it will all get done.

And no NYE post would be complete without a few resolutions here we go:

I intend to:

Exercise my mind and body more
Worry less
Be more creative
Put myself first
Not behave sluttishly around the house (only in connection to housework- OBVIOUSLY)
Give back to the community
Keep living in love

Merry Happy New Year everyone! Maybe I'll be back on here before another 12 month lapse!

MAYBE this will turn into a crazy wedding blog- who knows. (I really hope not, trying very hard to keep my inner bridezilla in check)

One love!
M

Busy Beautiful

I've been pretty busy lately. Tomorrow morning will be my first time off to myself in a while. Two weeks ago I got up and walked down to the coffee shop at the corner and sat and read the paper. It was lovely, and really invigorating. I walked through the back alleyways to my street and saw things I hadn't seen before.

Life is pretty amazing, I'm working hard on stopping every day and remembering that and then having a look at how beautiful the world around me is.

It's "extremely" cold out there this weekend. I have to say, I love it. Winter just makes me quite happy, when there is snow on the ground and we're all bundled up.

And it's on with the day!

Soul food

Soul food. What did you eat this year that you will never forget? What went into your mouth & touched your soul?

Hmm this is a tricky one, because I generally don't pay super attention to food. Although this year I'd have to say the one thing that sticks out is Australian Sour Cream. It's heavenly, it's like whipped butter but sour cream. It's amazing and delectable.

But more than that it's about HOW I eat, the best meals I've had are prepared with friends, shared over a bottle of wine and terrific conversation. And I've had these meals in many countries over the year, and that's makes me so happy.

Ordinary joy

Ordinary joy. Our most profound joy is often experienced during ordinary moments. What was one of your most joyful ordinary moments this year?

There are so many. I try to make sure one moment of every day is made extraordinary by my noticing it. But my most joyful moment of the year was coming back to Toronto, realizing that I have a home in this world. Coming to my apartment and being SO HAPPY to have my space back. To be happy to be alone.

Photo

Photo - a present to yourself. Sift through all the photos of you from the past year. Choose one that best captures you; either who you are, or who you strive to be. Find the shot of you that is worth a thousand words. Share the image, who shot it, where, and what it best reveals about you.

My Angel

 I took this picture, in my nook. It's of my Angel, my mum has the other half of it. She collects these types of angels and was pretty into it when I was in my teens. When I moved away to England at 18 she gave me this half to have and remember her with. I took it everywhere, this little angel has seen all of Europe. When I came home, I gave it back. But when I moved to Toronto- supposedly for school and for a limited time offer, but we both knew this was the move I was going to make forever, she gave it back to me and I never go anywhere with it. It keeps me connected to my mum, it watches me sleep and it makes me feel happy and connected to those far away when I look at it. I keep it by my bed so it's the last thing I see before sleep, and the first thing I look in the morning. The halo is pretty beat up and tattered these days- but then we've been through some rough times together.

I miss my family, there isn't a day that goes by that I wish I could live closer. There is no regret about moving to Toronto- ever. I love it here, I'm happy and this is, finally after years of searching, my home. So thank goodness for Skype and the phone and for my whole family.

Everything's OK

Everything's OK. What was the best moment that could serve as proof that everything is going to be alright? And how will you incorporate that discovery into the year ahead?

Hmm this one is weird, I already know everything is going to be OK. And I don't know if I can define it to a specific moment. Everyday that I wake up, it's OK, every time I walk outside, it's OK, every smile I have it's OK, every friend I speak to, it's OK.

So this hasn't been a discovery for this year, but I will continue to come back to now and remember in this moment, it's perfect. It is all perfect.

New Name

New name. Let's meet again, for the first time. If you could introduce yourself to strangers by another name for just one day, what would it be and why?

It would be Baroness Michelle Darlington, obviously! Why? Because I think I'm all classy and aristocratic (but realistic enough to only lust after a barony not a duchy) and Darling or Darlington would probably be the only names I'd trade my last name up for. Part of me thinks when you get married you should become a family unit and have one name. But what if that person you marry has a crappy name? I don't want to trade down in my name. I love my name. I have never really had any adverse feelings towards my name.

It's a bit of a funny name, mostly french with a good english kick in the backside. But my middle name is after my great grandmother, and I'm proud of that. Even though she passed when I was too young to remember her. And despite the teasing I received as a child about my name, I know that even if you were named Ann or Sally, you'd still get teased, kids are assholes.

So there you go. And don't forget to curtsey when we meet.